Biographies

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Eight Minutes Alone

It's day 4 of my 5-days as a solo dad.  I've been trying (I think successfully) to prove to Liam that he is still very much loved despite the fact that his brother is also loved.  Today, just now in fact, Liam and I invented a new and challenging game together that you can play in your very own home!

After another accident and a delicate reminder to Liam that the potty is just down the hall and doesn't he "want to have 'Potty Power' just like a big kid?", I went to grab the bottle of vodka Rugdoctor Spot & Stain Remover.  I made a mental note that it felt like it was just about a quarter full and that if potty training continues to go like this, we're gonna need more.

After peeling off his pants, using them to soak up the majority of the puddle, and sending him in the bathroom to see if there was any left (there wasn't), I finished cleaning up and decided to put Finn down for a nap.  I then went into the other bathroom to be a big kid myself.

When I got back Liam was holding the now empty bottle of Rugdoctor Spot & Stain Remover and a look that said, "So you LOVE me?  We'll see", and I began our new game I call Let's Discover What is Now Sprayed with Soapy Carpet Cleaner.

The answer was the following:  The stereo, the T.V. screen, both couches, the recliner, the coffee table, a stack of books, the recently folded laundry (silver star for that one), the antique cupboard with (apparently) colorfast paint, all the movies from Amelie through Rudy, the sub-woofer, the kitchen table, a stack of bills, and my cup of coffee (gold star for that one).

Fortunately Finn was safe in bed.  The cats are MIA.

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