Monday, June 11, 2012

The Most Important Day of My Friend's Life!

Everyone knows how I feel about marriage. In general I'm fairly 'meh' about the idea. But lately people seem determined to change my mind, and my dear friend Josie is no exception!

Josie got married on Saturday, woo hoo!! But whatever, this isn't about her, it's about meeeeee!

I love an occasion to get all dolled up. Well, scratch that - I love the point at which I'm actually dolled up. I hate the preparation and panic attacks leading up to that moment, but it's usually worth it.

Here I am, with the Back of the Bride
Since I'm not one of these women who has things like dresses just hanging in my closet, I almost always have to borrow something for special occasions. Josie herself offered to loan me something and told me to help myself to her (gorgeous, awe-inspiring) selection, but warned me NOT to take the wedding dress. Laaaaame! Also, she's teeny tiny. While I've trimmed down a little since my days of 'I'm depressed so I'll eat this entire Neapolitan pizza from Mary's Pizza Shack while I watch Billy Elliot and cry into my pillow', I'm still pretty swarthy next to Josie.

I decided to buy a dress, since this was a Big Day. Also because people in Healdsburg wear really expensive clothing and always look exceptionally well put-together, and I generally feel like a holey-pilled-cardigan-wearing crazy-cat-lady grandmother from Arkansas next to them.

In preparation, I got myself a manicure and pedicure. The ladies at my manicure place were kind enough not to comment on the troll-like aspects of my feet, as usual. This place is great - they always offer me a hot stone massage for my obviously overworked legs. After I refuse, they give it to me anyway! Yes! I am totally on to these women! As if that wasn't awesome enough, while my nails are drying, they always massage my shoulders. This could be awkward and creepy, but they are so good at it!  I mean sure, sometimes they cluck at me and tell me I'm getting kind of fat, but I love getting a bargain - so paying for nails and getting all kinds of extra rubdowns is my kind of deal.

As for the dress itself, after only spending about two hours and trying on approximately 49 dresses in my local used clothing shop, I found one that would work. An only-slightly-outdated Trina Turk dress, in various shades of green - normally a color I can pull off really well...just not these particular shades. But for only 24 bucks, who cares?! And it only had a few small reddish-orangey spots near the front hem, which I didn't notice until I got home. I think I still could have made this work - but, long story short...

I borrowed some shoes from a friend, then went to another friend's house to borrow some accessories... then her dog ate the shoes I'd borrowed, which meant that A) I'm an irresponsible and shitty friend and you should never loan me your favorite pair of shoes, and B) I needed a new outfit! With my dress being such weird greens, those were the only shoes that would have worked! (You're starting to understand why I get panic attacks about getting dressed up?)

I ended up just borrowing a dress, shoes, accessories and makeup application skills from the Guilty Dog friend. Except for my chonies, everything I wore was hers. Head to toe, baby! And I looked fantastic in her stuff! I received many compliments, seeing as how people aren't used to seeing me in heels. Or dresses. Or makeup. With my hair looking nice. Thanks Linda!

During the (sweetest) wedding (ever) itself I managed (barely) to contain the swirling well of emotion that I tend to keep deeply buried under cold, hard stone inside my sternum. Afterward we made our way to the reception, where I was recognized as the totally famous blogger that I am. Sort of. By one person. A little bit (shout out to Renee!!)

Anyway! Receptions are usually my specialty. I have this tradition of 'Freaking the Bride' during Love Shack, or any comparable canned wedding song. Oakland Bride - yep. Manhattan Bride - yep.  Mike's Bride - yep! Catholic Church Bride - yep!! Perhaps I've mentioned this to Josie before, and so I'm sure she chose to have a great, lively band playing Irish jigs JUST so that I had no excuse to Freak her on the dance floor. You simply cannot Freak to Celtic music! I settled for a kiss instead.

Aw, smoochy kiss...

Josie obviously wanted more, though, and went in for the real deal. Where I was all 'oh, ha ha, a kiss? Well okay', she was all 'Let's Do This', as you can see:

Look at her! She's TOTALLY into it. Sow those oats, sister!
After that I went for a cool-down walk, and discovered an adorable little playground. Anyone who knows me knows that I love me some swinging, especially in idyllic settings.

la la la...swinging....

I immediately thought of my current facebook profile picture, which features me swinging in Hawaii. I said to my boyfriend "oh, I need a new profile picture, this is perfect! I can take a new swinging one to replace the old swinging one!" He took this:

WHOA!!! That is one Not At All Flattering shot! Thanks baby.

Aside from that one photo, it was a really beautiful night. I saw many old friends, met some fabulous new ones (Irish people - So Fun!), and saw two beautiful, madly-in-love people tie the knot. Also, I got a free dinner.

(Congrats to the Bride and Groom - I love you guys!)

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